Monday, November 18, 2002

A Tangi for Lou

I went to Lou Brookes' Tangi (funeral) this morning. Lou was a year younger than I. Lou had cancer and, in his last stages asked to be moved back from Auckland to Huntly where he was born.
Lou was a Maori and in his younger days was a salesman for the firm I worked for at that time. Everyone liked Lou and liked his fast patter. In later years Lou worked the markets up in Auckland and everyone knew him, once met forgotten, never!
Lou's Tangi was held at Te Ohaki Marae and the Tangi follows a similar format to the more familiar Church funeral service. The Tangi differs subtly in feel to a Church funeral. A sorry sadness pervades, that the person has left his relatives and friends behind and softly in the background keening will be heard from one or more of the older ladies. The Marae service is relatively short but the graveside service is much longer than a Church service. The hymns are sung as in Church, but no organ music is needed here. The Maori have fine and tuneful voices.
At the graveside, speakers will talk to the person in a conversational tone as his body rests in the grave. Some may sing a verse or two of a favourite remembered song. The immediate family standing around the grave will cuddle each other adults and children and often will sadly weep. It is very moving. Truly felt emotions are not at all suppressed. An orator or orators will call out the persons' life and ask why he has left them.
I was glad to be able to say goodbye to Lou. I was glad I could drop a proffered flower on his coffin. I was glad I met his remembered family now grown up with children of their own. And, I was glad they came up and remembered me. Lou was a little more than an acquaintance Lou was a friend from long ago.

Wednesday, November 06, 2002

Journal Bullies

OldEric says :- Another dark and/or controversial subject. The newspapers are often full of bullying reports in schools both here and overseas. Bullying has always existed both mental and physical. I'm not talking gang related stand over tactics but general bullying, one trying to dominate another bullying.
From experience of 4 schools I attended in the 1940s bullying was generally tolerated by authorities in England as long as it didn't get out of hand. It was tolerated because it was a part of growing up, it was considered as part of the formation of ones character--it helped to form ones character, to stand on ones feet. Some may say hindered the formation of ones character. I'm inclined to the former. Bullying was tolerated by authorities to help one to learn how to deal with the problems of life both in childhood and most certainly in adulthood. Bullies grow up and in the main bullies do not change their ways, they may change their methods but they still bully if allowed to do so.
I will over the next few days relate 3 stories of bullying and the results during my school years.